Have a cigar!
Well, I've birthed my alien baby, and Dana Scully didn't show up. Not even under the veil of anesthesia. Oh well. But I'm up and around. Didn't have any problems, started eating as soon as I got home, including a fabu chocolate mousse cake that my buddy Marty bought for me, no pain, discomfort, nausea, crop circles, etc. etc. Was just a little shaky on my feet for a few hours after I got home, being all loopy and stuff. But I'm better now, and will drive home tomorrow.
Never saw the doctor after the surgery though, so I guess no news is good news. I'll talk to him in a week or so for the pathology report, which should confirm that this was indeed an alien baby and not say... that nasty black oil that infects you to which only that bastard Krycek has the cure.
So, does anyone else miss the X-Files?
Monday, September 29, 2003
Thursday, September 25, 2003
Observations on Canada
Well, I can't really say Canada, per se, because I've only ever been to Ontario (well, to Quebec once, but they don't count. They act like they're their own country). Then again, I'm really basing these observations on the area I've been coming to since December, which is Kitchener-Waterloo. So I guess these are really observations about one region of Canada. And I mean no disrespect to my Maritime blog-buddy, Marc!
1) Seems like all Canadians are blond and fair-skinned. The one's that aren't are clearly foreigners from another country with an accent and everything, or are....me.
2) Across the board, whenever you order take-out food, they never, EVER get the order right.
3) There are alot of bad teeth up here.
4) They drive like little old Florida ladies on regular roads, but on the highway they'll mow yer ass down.
5) There are not alot of diners up here.
6) They have the nerve to make fun of my accent.
7) They have the best beer ever.
Well, I can't really say Canada, per se, because I've only ever been to Ontario (well, to Quebec once, but they don't count. They act like they're their own country). Then again, I'm really basing these observations on the area I've been coming to since December, which is Kitchener-Waterloo. So I guess these are really observations about one region of Canada. And I mean no disrespect to my Maritime blog-buddy, Marc!
1) Seems like all Canadians are blond and fair-skinned. The one's that aren't are clearly foreigners from another country with an accent and everything, or are....me.
2) Across the board, whenever you order take-out food, they never, EVER get the order right.
3) There are alot of bad teeth up here.
4) They drive like little old Florida ladies on regular roads, but on the highway they'll mow yer ass down.
5) There are not alot of diners up here.
6) They have the nerve to make fun of my accent.
7) They have the best beer ever.
Monday, September 22, 2003
Need a tissue for your issue?
Greetings, all, from beautiful Canada. We've mixed three songs so far... 9 to go.
But I thought I'd just give you this little rant. Check out this first line from an e-mail I got.
It's ______, Remember me? i'm the one who asked you out for coffee a few months ago and you turned me down...
because you are focusing on your career :) We talked about you performing at _______ a few months ago and I'm wondering if you're available in November.....
D'YA THINK SHE HAS ISSUES????
She didn't say "Remember me? We talked about you performing here in the past. Sorry for the delay in getting back to you..." Or "Remember me? We sat together at so-and-so's concert in Ithaca..." No. Hi Leah. I'm the girl you turned down and you're damn right I ain't over it!
Good lord, people. Just calm down, already, all of you! I've already run into TWO women I turned down while out with Kelly. In fact, one of those women had also asked Kelly out at one time and had also been turned down. So, imagine her attitude when she saw the both of us clearly together! That was entertaining, I must say. Poor thing.
Well, anyway, just felt like ranting that. Not really a rant though. Actually I find it all amusing. I could have told them the TRUTH about why I was turning each down, but that would be, well, cruel frankly. And even I don't have that in me.
Be back soon. If any of you locals feel like checking in on Mary Rose, she's house/cat sitting for me! No wild parties! But you can drink my beer.
Smooches!
Greetings, all, from beautiful Canada. We've mixed three songs so far... 9 to go.
But I thought I'd just give you this little rant. Check out this first line from an e-mail I got.
It's ______, Remember me? i'm the one who asked you out for coffee a few months ago and you turned me down...
because you are focusing on your career :) We talked about you performing at _______ a few months ago and I'm wondering if you're available in November.....
D'YA THINK SHE HAS ISSUES????
She didn't say "Remember me? We talked about you performing here in the past. Sorry for the delay in getting back to you..." Or "Remember me? We sat together at so-and-so's concert in Ithaca..." No. Hi Leah. I'm the girl you turned down and you're damn right I ain't over it!
Good lord, people. Just calm down, already, all of you! I've already run into TWO women I turned down while out with Kelly. In fact, one of those women had also asked Kelly out at one time and had also been turned down. So, imagine her attitude when she saw the both of us clearly together! That was entertaining, I must say. Poor thing.
Well, anyway, just felt like ranting that. Not really a rant though. Actually I find it all amusing. I could have told them the TRUTH about why I was turning each down, but that would be, well, cruel frankly. And even I don't have that in me.
Be back soon. If any of you locals feel like checking in on Mary Rose, she's house/cat sitting for me! No wild parties! But you can drink my beer.
Smooches!
Wednesday, September 17, 2003
Blogging for blogging's sake...
...because I can't stand that jerk's picture anymore, I needed to push it down the page a little.
Random thoughts:
* I'm going to Canada to mix the CD and I'll be gone two weeks. I don't know if I'll get a chance to blog. You never know.
* I have too much to do, only one day to do it, and I'm getting all anxious and neurotic about it.
* My booking agent talks too much about ideas that aren't in the realm of booking, and hasn't actually done any booking.
* I'm tired of getting screwed by people.
* I need a new car.
* I wish people would just take the bull by the damn horns, instead of calling me and asking me how to do it, or worse yet, asking ME to do it. Nike's slogan is "Just do it". Leah's slogan is "Just fucking do it yourself!"
* My mom makes really good soup.
* Farris wants me to feed him. RIGHT NOW!
So, I gotta go.
...because I can't stand that jerk's picture anymore, I needed to push it down the page a little.
Random thoughts:
* I'm going to Canada to mix the CD and I'll be gone two weeks. I don't know if I'll get a chance to blog. You never know.
* I have too much to do, only one day to do it, and I'm getting all anxious and neurotic about it.
* My booking agent talks too much about ideas that aren't in the realm of booking, and hasn't actually done any booking.
* I'm tired of getting screwed by people.
* I need a new car.
* I wish people would just take the bull by the damn horns, instead of calling me and asking me how to do it, or worse yet, asking ME to do it. Nike's slogan is "Just do it". Leah's slogan is "Just fucking do it yourself!"
* My mom makes really good soup.
* Farris wants me to feed him. RIGHT NOW!
So, I gotta go.
Monday, September 15, 2003
Addendum to the post below...
Here's a photo of the freak who did the penis sling dance. Except in this photo, he's wearing clothes and is doing some other dance with a lofty, indecipherable message.
Read the following post for the full story. And yes, I used this photo from the D&C without permission. So sue me.
Here's a photo of the freak who did the penis sling dance. Except in this photo, he's wearing clothes and is doing some other dance with a lofty, indecipherable message.
Read the following post for the full story. And yes, I used this photo from the D&C without permission. So sue me.
Sunday, September 14, 2003
Art for ego's sake.
You know what I don't like about most grass roots art? It's usually pretentious and self-serving. And if you have to EXPLAIN your work to me, then you've failed as an artist. Shouldn't the art speak for itself?
That being said, Kelly and I went to Artwalk today in Rochester. What a weird day. The whole event was a testament to mediocrity, yet I still had a great time, probably because the whole thing was so bizarre and well, laughable.
Firstly, it wasn't the type of street festival where you walk along and experience whatever is happening as you go. No. The organizers had arranged it so you went to one thing at a time: "Okay, direct your attention here while we make boring speeches patting ourselves on the back. Okay, now go over there and listen to this poet, or that singer, or whatnot..." I'm not sure I liked having my artistic experience dictated to me, especially if I didn't like the performance.
There was an African drumming/dancing troupe (with a bunch of non-African/white people in it) who was great. Then one of my favorite groups, The Hayseeds, performed, and did they give them a sound system? No. The boring poets were blasted for blocks, but this hysterical satire on white trash bluegrass couldn't be heard for five feet. Then there was this "dancer" who "choreographed" a piece which was nothing more than him practically naked (only wore flesh colored underwear), hooked up in a sling so he's suspended horizontally in the air, writhing about in said sling to the song "Please Release Me". I laughed my ass off thinking it was a sarcastic statement of bitter heartbreak, but then Kelly said she didn't think he meant it to be funny. Hmm...that didn't even cross my mind because it was so fucking absurd. Not to mention his big huge distracting basket poking out from the sling. Giving himself a big hard-on over his own stupid performance. Egomaniac.
Then there was the belly-dancing troupe. Except for one stunningly gorgeous woman who danced beautifully, the rest were middle-aged, out-of-shape, hefty women with bare midriffs. Two of the women were wearing costumes that concealed their bellies, and a little girl behind me said to her mom "They're not wearing the belly shirts". And her mom said, "No, they're old! They won't be wearing those". And oh yeah! The pretentious dance by the dancer doing the "womb" dance within a diamond of branches and leaves.
THEN, my friend's duo was playing in front of a big audience, and they'd just started their third song when the music organizer interrupted her while she was singing and told her they had to stop because some poet had to read. How rude. So after that they started their set again but now they had no audience. And in the middle of the same song, the sound system started blasting Spyro Gyra or some 80's fusion band like that. Well, they just packed up and left, and I don't blame them. That was beyond infuriating and rude treatment for a free gig.
But the best part of the day was the grand finale. And I don't mean this sarcastically, I truly loved it: Four payloaders and 10 dancers. The payloaders, decorated festively, did this whole choreography with each other with the dancers accenting the dance. It was fun and fresh and unique and just plain lighthearted. Brilliant, I thought.
And no beer to be bought anywhere.
You know what I don't like about most grass roots art? It's usually pretentious and self-serving. And if you have to EXPLAIN your work to me, then you've failed as an artist. Shouldn't the art speak for itself?
That being said, Kelly and I went to Artwalk today in Rochester. What a weird day. The whole event was a testament to mediocrity, yet I still had a great time, probably because the whole thing was so bizarre and well, laughable.
Firstly, it wasn't the type of street festival where you walk along and experience whatever is happening as you go. No. The organizers had arranged it so you went to one thing at a time: "Okay, direct your attention here while we make boring speeches patting ourselves on the back. Okay, now go over there and listen to this poet, or that singer, or whatnot..." I'm not sure I liked having my artistic experience dictated to me, especially if I didn't like the performance.
There was an African drumming/dancing troupe (with a bunch of non-African/white people in it) who was great. Then one of my favorite groups, The Hayseeds, performed, and did they give them a sound system? No. The boring poets were blasted for blocks, but this hysterical satire on white trash bluegrass couldn't be heard for five feet. Then there was this "dancer" who "choreographed" a piece which was nothing more than him practically naked (only wore flesh colored underwear), hooked up in a sling so he's suspended horizontally in the air, writhing about in said sling to the song "Please Release Me". I laughed my ass off thinking it was a sarcastic statement of bitter heartbreak, but then Kelly said she didn't think he meant it to be funny. Hmm...that didn't even cross my mind because it was so fucking absurd. Not to mention his big huge distracting basket poking out from the sling. Giving himself a big hard-on over his own stupid performance. Egomaniac.
Then there was the belly-dancing troupe. Except for one stunningly gorgeous woman who danced beautifully, the rest were middle-aged, out-of-shape, hefty women with bare midriffs. Two of the women were wearing costumes that concealed their bellies, and a little girl behind me said to her mom "They're not wearing the belly shirts". And her mom said, "No, they're old! They won't be wearing those". And oh yeah! The pretentious dance by the dancer doing the "womb" dance within a diamond of branches and leaves.
THEN, my friend's duo was playing in front of a big audience, and they'd just started their third song when the music organizer interrupted her while she was singing and told her they had to stop because some poet had to read. How rude. So after that they started their set again but now they had no audience. And in the middle of the same song, the sound system started blasting Spyro Gyra or some 80's fusion band like that. Well, they just packed up and left, and I don't blame them. That was beyond infuriating and rude treatment for a free gig.
But the best part of the day was the grand finale. And I don't mean this sarcastically, I truly loved it: Four payloaders and 10 dancers. The payloaders, decorated festively, did this whole choreography with each other with the dancers accenting the dance. It was fun and fresh and unique and just plain lighthearted. Brilliant, I thought.
And no beer to be bought anywhere.
Thursday, September 11, 2003
General bitch.
1) Full Moon last night, still feeling the effects.
2) Moon in Aries today.
3) Mercury in retrograde.
4) Can't get shit done, no matter how much I work, I still never get to the bottom of the pile.
5) Stuck on lyrics for a new song.
6) My brother never fucking pays me for work done on time and I have to wait and wait and wait. That's nice for him in his quarter-of-a-million-dollar house, but I'm out of money.
7) I'm out of money.
8) Producer changed the studio dates on me, now my mom and I are gone at the SAME time and now I have to board the cats.
9) Farris is now incontinent.
10) I am totally neurotic, more uptight than I thought, high maintenance, and I need to get the fuck over myself.
Don't get me wrong. Despite all this, I'm not feeling badly. Just a little stressed and overwhelmed.
1) Full Moon last night, still feeling the effects.
2) Moon in Aries today.
3) Mercury in retrograde.
4) Can't get shit done, no matter how much I work, I still never get to the bottom of the pile.
5) Stuck on lyrics for a new song.
6) My brother never fucking pays me for work done on time and I have to wait and wait and wait. That's nice for him in his quarter-of-a-million-dollar house, but I'm out of money.
7) I'm out of money.
8) Producer changed the studio dates on me, now my mom and I are gone at the SAME time and now I have to board the cats.
9) Farris is now incontinent.
10) I am totally neurotic, more uptight than I thought, high maintenance, and I need to get the fuck over myself.
Don't get me wrong. Despite all this, I'm not feeling badly. Just a little stressed and overwhelmed.
Wednesday, September 10, 2003
Tuesday, September 09, 2003
Hey, I'm back!
1) Finished recording all the parts in Canada last week. The CD sounds FUCKING AWESOME! I go back next week to mix it, master it, then I can get it manufactured. Woo hoo!
2) Hung with my girls this weekend at a friend's cottage. These are my Buffalo buds, and once a year we get together at the cottage for girls' weekend which involves much drinking, boating, and tarot card reading. Last year's tarot reading basically said, "dump the girl you're dating". This year's said "You're finally about to get some payback, and it's about fucking time". Well, I may have added the last part of that sentence. Funniest moment of the weekend:
We were talking to our friend Lisa who has, I am not making this up, West Nile Virus. And Katie was talking to her about it and said "Isn't it true that now that you've had it, you can never get it again?" And Debbie (a/k/a G.O.D.) said "Isn't it true that once your leg has been amputated, it can never be amputated again?" Well christ, I literally hit the ground I was laughing so damn hard. Debbie is about the funniest woman I know, and when I'm around her I have to wear depends or something, because she makes ya laugh so hard you can't help but piss yourself.
3) Things with Kelly are going smashingly. Did I mention I really, really, really like her? Big surprise to me this whole thing, but good. Really good.
4) Here's about the only thing that will ever grow in my uterus:
Follow the lines: The red line outlines my uterus. The blue line outlines the POLYP that is growing there. Maybe it's one of those cool dermoid cysts that has teeth and hair and eyeballs on it. Wouldn't that be cool? Too bad they wouldn't let me keep it. I could put it on a shelf with it's cyclop eyeball staring at people, and I could name it "Belial". Just like in Basket Case.
Anyway, I go get it taken out Oct. 2.
So, what's up with all of you?
1) Finished recording all the parts in Canada last week. The CD sounds FUCKING AWESOME! I go back next week to mix it, master it, then I can get it manufactured. Woo hoo!
2) Hung with my girls this weekend at a friend's cottage. These are my Buffalo buds, and once a year we get together at the cottage for girls' weekend which involves much drinking, boating, and tarot card reading. Last year's tarot reading basically said, "dump the girl you're dating". This year's said "You're finally about to get some payback, and it's about fucking time". Well, I may have added the last part of that sentence. Funniest moment of the weekend:
We were talking to our friend Lisa who has, I am not making this up, West Nile Virus. And Katie was talking to her about it and said "Isn't it true that now that you've had it, you can never get it again?" And Debbie (a/k/a G.O.D.) said "Isn't it true that once your leg has been amputated, it can never be amputated again?" Well christ, I literally hit the ground I was laughing so damn hard. Debbie is about the funniest woman I know, and when I'm around her I have to wear depends or something, because she makes ya laugh so hard you can't help but piss yourself.
3) Things with Kelly are going smashingly. Did I mention I really, really, really like her? Big surprise to me this whole thing, but good. Really good.
4) Here's about the only thing that will ever grow in my uterus:
Follow the lines: The red line outlines my uterus. The blue line outlines the POLYP that is growing there. Maybe it's one of those cool dermoid cysts that has teeth and hair and eyeballs on it. Wouldn't that be cool? Too bad they wouldn't let me keep it. I could put it on a shelf with it's cyclop eyeball staring at people, and I could name it "Belial". Just like in Basket Case.
Anyway, I go get it taken out Oct. 2.
So, what's up with all of you?
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